Let’s Go Outside: Is it worth it?

2 May

_DSC0265For the first time ever I’m wondering whether its worth having all the animals we do, all the space we have to maintain, all the young trees we have to watch over. I know we’ve had a few deaths recently, which is always incredibly upsetting, but I’m left feeling a little overwhelmed by the sheer scale of it all.

I know writing on a blog, or facebook, or twitter where you can pick and choose the best pictures and create a wonderful looking life – can be incredibly deceptive. It doesn’t show the days where you are struggling to get out of bed due to a lingering virus or explain the guilt you feel for being ill. The small worries that mount up because you can’t take the dog on a long walk, give the chickens their afternoon corn or go searching for the duck eggs.

We have built a dream life here. And I love it. Normally.

But this is one of those days I think we’ve bitten off more than we can chew and it wouldn’t be fair not to record those days, as well as the good ones.

To be fair, it was only yesterday when I was googling which chickens to buy next to give us a gorgeous chocolate coloured egg shell. So I am sure this feeling sorry for myself is just a temporary blip.

Advertisements

2 Responses to “Let’s Go Outside: Is it worth it?”

  1. Judy May 2, 2014 at 10:58 pm #

    Sorry you having a rough time, I promise it will pass. Some days everything just seems overwhelming and then suddenly the chickens will do something incredibly funny or the sun shines on the cherry blossom and everything will turn round and you will think you are the luckiest person in the world again. We have had a small holding for ten years now and no one can imagine how hard it can be to keep going especially as you say when you lose favourite animals (our favourite chicken was dive bombed by a hawk in broad daylight and died instantly of fright a few days ago, she was such a character we miss her terribly) but the swallows have come back to the barn and are busy rebuilding their old nests and that seems like a miracle that they have found their way back again from Africa! Keeps us going.

    • Helen May 3, 2014 at 7:23 am #

      Judy thank you so much for your encouragement. I’m sure it will pass, I do love it out there. That is so sad about your chicken. I saw a sparrowhawk take a baby bird last night, the parents were so angry, it just broke my heart. There are definitely good days and bad.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s